Alhamdulillah! Akhirnya dapat juga aku bertemu dengan Irwan. Happy lah..saper tak happy. Heehee.. Semalam, dia ajukan soalan cepumas yang aku tidak dapat jawab dengan baik..
Irwan: Awak.. kite nak tanye awak smth eh. Ape yang ada dari diri kite yang membuat awak terpikat in the first place?
CT: Erm..err..Ape eh. Hmm.. Ntah ar awak.. kite sendiri tak tau. Bila kite tanya awak, "awak sukekan kite eh" kite bukannye imagine nak bersama ngan awak sepanjang hayat.. (what i mean no high expectations) tapi..ntah eh, kite pun tak tau ape yang membuat kite terpikat ngan awak..haha!
Sometimes things just happens without us realising. Of course now I hope to spend the rest of my life with him. I wasn't really tergiler kan Irwan in the first place..kalau dia kata dia tak suke aku, aku relek jek. Cuma aku nak tau ape isi hati dia kat aku. Dari pengalaman, semakin aku curious dan simpan perasaan dalam hati, semakin aku kelu atau takut nak luahkan perasaan. Tup tup tup...terlambat dan hati pun terluka.
Irwan kata, "Dulu kite asyik2 carik perempuan.. kawan kite ckp kite ni muke tembok.."
CT: Ouh..shiok sendiri katakan.. haha
Irwan: Ye lah.. Abeh perempuan tu tak sukekan kite balik. Mcm she's leading me on..tapi in the end dia kata she streat me as a friend. Then mak kite ckp tak usah kite carik jodoh, dia sendiri akan datang.. Alih2.. orang kat depan kite ni come into my life..haha..
CT: Ouh.. gituk. Maksud mak awak tuh..biar yang si muke tembok tu datang, tak payah jadi muke tembok. Kite ni kan tak tau malu orangnyer..hahaah..
Kelakar sey. But it's true lah, expect my last dialong tuh. Haha. Kekadang ape yang kite nak, tak dapat atau ditolak.. pastu give up abes. Ada yang carik punyer carik..tapi tak de langsung. Kekadang ada tak kite pikir, biar masa yang menentukan. Sometimes things doesn't go as our way. Macam si dia tuh.. plan nak ade ahem2 lepas NS.. tapi, da ditakdirkan bertemu dengan aku sebelum NS..wakakaka!
Still, aku masih mencari jawapan kenapa eh aku boleh terpikat kat dia? Haha. Mungkin soal hati tak perlu jawapan, it just come naturally. Irwan is simple guy..almaklumlah 'Mr Simple' katakan *sarcastic tone*. His simplicity just menarik perhatian aku. Jadi, tok seh susah2 nak jadi outstanding person to woo others. Just be urself.
Memang at first2 biler kenal, kite nampak the beauty side of the other.. Macam Irwan ngat aku ni baik, tapi biler da in r/s dapat tau aku ni nakal.. haha, suke bully2 dia. esp 'kepala botak'. Dan vice-versa. Maka bila kita dah tau the bad side of the other, bolehkah kite terima dengan sepenuh hati? Kalau tak boleh, bawak berbincang..kalau tak leh jugak, means dua2 tak sehaluan.
Bukannyer aku nak bangga2kan relationship aku. Tapi aku rasa tul2 bersyukur dapat dia.. belajar mcm mana nak berdiri dua kaki selepas jatuh. Yang aku sukakan adalah kite lebih berbincang, elakkan diri daripada bertengkar. Dia tuh tengah confuse nak ambek 9 months ke 6 months OCF lepas BMT yang akan berakhir Mac ni.
Irwan: Kite rasa kite nak tarik diri dari 9months OCF lah awak..
CT: Kenapa?
Irwan: Ye, kite tau pangkat besar..gaji besar. Tapi nak tinggalkan awak jauh, kite berat hati.
CT: *fuh..terharu aku. haha* Gi jek la. Tu kan ape yang awak nak.. Tak yah fikirkan sal kite
Irwan: Kite might be travelling to other countries tau awk. Macam mana nak contact awak..
CT: Tak ape. Skejap jek. Is that what you want ? To go for the 9 months kan
Irwan: A ah..
CT: Dont if you want to achieve something, dont let anything or anyone hinder you. Go for it!
Irwan: Chey wah.. girfriend support kite sey.. haha
Being in relationship or a marriage, doesnt hinder a person to be a successful. And I dislike people giving excuses, "I cannot succeed because I have many responsibilities". You are given thousands of choices and freedom to be who you want to be. Resposibilities never equals to burden. Thus, it is not a huge tall wall with block you from what you want in life.
I giving you support Irwan, cah-yoh!!! Khakhakaha..
Anyway, I had a great time with him yesterday after the taklimat Pesta Pantun @ NUS. We managed to go home before 11!!! Yeah!!!! Hahaha.. Today afternoon, went to his house. I bought rojak petis for his family and I. I had my wonderful lunch there. Watch DEMAND TV - RV and afterwards, help him to pack his army things.
Then I fall asleep at the living room.. but soon wake up when I heard Kecik's voice, asking for help in Add.Maths. Susah banget nak solve!! Haha.. coz I dont take A.Maths.
At 5 plus, antar him to JEast where he go with his friend to Tekong.
Anyway, I like what Star had tagged ''Dont make him your everything. Because if you lose him, you will have nothing..'' But I dont make him my everything but I am afaird to lose him somehow.. hehe..Thanks!
And do I spend my time wisely when he's not around. Still enjoying doing voluntary work and going to school as usual. Plus I will have a part-time job as a tutor soon. And will be busy with competitions for the next two months.
It's not that I'm miss him every single seconds but because he is not in Singapore.. it keep me worry and he's becoming weaker nowadays.. But it's okay, whatever it is.. my life is normal. haha!
Thank you taggers..!!
Okies dokies, gtg
Bye
Wassalam
Rohani
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